We take care of health, wealth, our family and clothing but including friends to this list is smart as friends are one’s greatest assets. see distinctions and not divisions. For it is said, “A friend in need is a friend indeed”. To connect to people through the heart makes more friends. One’s sorrow can be shared to a friend, and as the Swedish proverb says, “Shared sorrow is half a sorrow”. George Washington said, “True friendship is a plant of slow growth”. William Shakespeare said, “I am wealthy among my friends”. If one knows the art of building friends, there will hardly be loneliness. Friendship builds bridges, but loneliness builds walls instead of bridges.
What is the best recipe to make friends?
The best recipe to make friends is to be a friend. A wise friendship brings sunshine to the shade and shade to the sunshine. To have a close friend or to be a true friend is better than having a thousand acquaintances. So, don’t limit a friendship to an acquaintance. Be genuinely interested in a person. At times, it may take a longer period to become a friend and make others interested in you. But you should continue because you do not know when it will happen. If you observe a dog, a friendly dog, it shows its friendship by constantly wagging its tail – whether you are a friend or not. Learn from a dog how to be a true friend.
How to have a disciplined mind?
Don’t fight with your mind. Instead, love your mind. Make it a friend, and then gently and lovingly coax it in the right direction. What is the mind? It is nothing but a bundle of thoughts. So lovingly look at your thoughts. Learn to talk to your thoughts. Learn to observe your thoughts. When you observe your thoughts, you will realize thoughts are nothing but an expression of your values. A value is something you give importance to. It can be positive or negative. It depends on what importance you attach to that value. Then reflect to see whether that value is helping you or destroying you. But, deal with your mind all the time like a friend and not like an enemy. See the “price” of having a certain value and the “pay off” you get in having that value. See the “pros and cons” of the value. Then through reflection you will see whether it is beneficial or not. The moment you see it totally, then an action is born out of that understanding. Such an action is spontaneous and not forced. When you know totally that this food is poisoned without effort you will give it away. One has to totally see the problem. We don’t bring that total understanding, but a superficial understanding and hence understanding does not work for people.
This total understanding brings in intelligence and with intelligence your understanding of the mind will be total. Intelligence is the capacity to deal with your mind and life as a whole and not in fragments. Fragments create conflict, the whole is inclusive. Division creates conflict, but you will see distinctions and there is a difference between seeing distinction and seeing it in a divisive way.
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